Lucky me.

I did it. I read her blog. Maddie's Mom. The mother who's baby passed away from SIDS.
My curiosity got the best of me. I hoped and even honestly thought that I would go read her blog tonight and read that she is doing well... that life is back on track, and every thing happens for a reason. Nope. She's still sad. (Go figure!) And reading still makes me sad. Her daughter is 10 months now. Or would be. God how sad.
I read that blog and I wanted to run into my children's bedroom and hug, squeeze and kiss them, and just love them! Make sure they know how much! Make sure I know how much! Some days I get so stressed out. Two littles feels like 10 some days. And they are both little to the point that I still have to do everything for them. It gets really hard. But I read this blog and it reminds me how much worse it could be. It reminds me that I am so completely and totally blessed.
A good day for this mother is not thinking too much about the fact that her child is dead. Wow, what a slap in the face. It makes me feel ungrateful, to ever get frustrated with my perfect, wonderful, insane, messy, naughty, beautiful, silly babies. They are so perfect for me, and they push me in every way, both good and bad. Sometimes I miss my freedom, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. My son and my daughter are the reason I wake up. They are the reason I have a reason to wake up. Three square meals, and bath time, and bed time stories, and bubbles and Art projects, and HOPE... for all that they will do in life, and all that we will do together.
I am so beyond blessed.